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Counting Eyes

by Laura Boswell

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1.
Counting eyes on the ground, I'll cover them one by one. I never said they were allowed to lie here. I've gotten lost without the smell that leads me to the water. It's gotten so hard to tell where you are now. Leaving with the day until I am forgotten. There is nothing more left to say, I'll be off then. Save me now while you still have my heart. Save me now so we don't have to start again.
2.
Letters 04:01
I'm writing a letter to your sweet memory, about all the sounds in the night and the smell of the sea. I'll carry it to the waves. I'll carry it to the waves and let it go. I'm holding a picture of us on top of a mountain, looking out at the world from outer space. I'll drop it onto the treetops. I will toss it to the treetops for their photo album. I'm letting a symphony steal my heart away, and all the sounds from a room where I heard you play. But I won't let that go. No I won't let that go, I'm going to play all of the music that's now gone.
3.
Quickly 02:58
We live so quickly, we can't feel our breath before it leaves. We never learn in silence, we just shout out loud until something breaks. We don't see what the world can't take. We left our bottles on the ground and in the lake. We slit the trees until they can't breathe for us. They can't breathe for us. They can't breathe.
4.
How I Feel 03:37
This is how I feel- couldn't tell you until now.. The unexpected rain froze my breath, it is winter now, I guess. And your face hasn't changed since our lives rearranged themselves into dissonance.. But I fell like the leaves, and I'm naked now with the trees. Will we wait for spring? Will we cower until April? Will you let me play this song for you?
5.
Indecision 03:56
The sky is blowing away, and I can't exactly conjure the words I want to say to you. This grass feels damp upon my skin, but it hasn't rained for weeks. Perhaps my judgment is not sound, I'm 300 miles away, I'm 300 miles away. I'm surrounded without you in this nest. It'll be warm through the winter with this breast. But I don't know if I can let that happen, the earth stays warm even when we neglect it. You know I hate decisions and this one is no exception. You say you fell out of love for me... So, how can I say no? How can I go? How can I say no? How can I go?
6.
Flowers 03:13
Sun cries at midday, cries not to be forgotten. And the moonlight on your face sighs knowing it's unwanted. Flowers spread their hearts, seeping up all skies present them. Turn the rain into colors, and the darkness into light. The wind bites on my face. It came from over the hill. Can't see it, can only breathe it, and the danger lies where it's still. 'Cause I'm no flower, can't sway in this tide. And if I stay another hour I think I'll break in your eyes.
7.
This sounds like a song for the silence, and the longing to go back home, to leave again. And this looks like the faces I have put on, you have put on, and that we ripped off to find ourselves in an open field collapsed by the sunset. This feels like the doubt, the excitement, and how I know now that uncertainty is a certainty- that you wanted a world and to give nothing back. And this feels like your breath converged with mine, how the rise and the fall would let all of this die. And this feels like the crush and the crash, the sudden whiplash that would send me off a mountain. And this sounds like the rhythm of you tapping in the morning, about four o'clock. And your tiptoes, the kindness of your touch, and my laughter, I miss it so much. So much. And this looks like a plane over our heads and a shooting star not far behind.
8.
Stand 03:25
Stand at the edge of the water please, I just can't let you come in. 'Cause I worry that words left unspoken will make me forget how to swim. And I never let you down, no I never let you down. Stand, stand. Stand, stand... and... and... and.....
9.
Time 05:22
Clouds break the morning as I wake for you. Time left its door wide open for you to let me in. Tumbling towards tomorrow, I've got cuts on both of my knees. I'll kindly let you borrow all I clearly see: white blades of frozen grass turning into light. I watch closely as we still keep breathing. I watch as the morning light keeps leaving. I watch closely, listening slowly, I watch while you sleep. I watch closely, listening slowly, I watch while, while you sleep. Time left more for you. Time left more for you. Time left us waiting in the night. Time left us waiting in the night. The night is always too long...
10.
Unprepared 05:28
You're like rain in the morning, a sudden change without warning. And I came so unprepared, with my bare feet and my tangled hair. I am so unprepared, with no suspicions or expectations. Now the sun is racing behind the sky before my eyes. And I think it's chasing the broken time that was left behind. And when it catches up I hope it feels the same and that it wants to stay. And when it catches up I hope it's as beautiful as the sky in flight. It's painting something we should memorize, before it lets us close our eyes.
11.
It seems that I'm always left alone to make music out of my sadness and confusion. It seems that I always follow your time, only using your watch. But it's my time you keep spending, guess you don't think it's worth very much. I am sick, I'm sick and tired of my love being misused. I'm sick, I'm sick and tired 'cause my heart keeps getting abused, abused. These boys, they like to make my mind stop- for me to only think of them.. And then when they make my heart stop they just lose their sensibility. And I wish I wasn't so ready to just give myself away, if I could just save all of love's casualties and stop eating what killers say, what they say. Are you happy now that everywhere I go I look for you? That we're playing hide and seek and only you know the rules? Are you happy now that everywhere I go I look for you? That we're playing hide and seek and only you know the rules?
12.
It started with the words you should have not said. I wonder could things have been different had I just gone to bed. But I just wanted to be in love, yeah I decided I would be in love. I surrendered to sleepless mornings for your company. I wish you had given me some warning before I cried You don't want to be in love, but you decided I would be in love.
13.
I want to fall into the sky, no destination yet... Somewhere where gravity has no control over me, so I can slip between. I have been waiting, waiting, on my mind to shed its skin and breathe lightly.. To breathe in all the nuance of the earth, of what is real... it's been stuck in traffic for so long. Saw it inscribed on the tracks of my eyes- it was knee deep. Waited to dive until all of the lies merged together. Broke through the teeth, now I'm floating beneath what I thought to be life, what I cradled till death. Was so thin that it broke with the breath of my hands, and it melted around my body that stands. I'm letting my body go for now. I'll ask it to return when it's grown wings.

about

Recorded and produced in 2012-2013 by Ben Singer in Greensboro, NC. Featuring Kasey Horton on viola, Doug Harrison on upright bass, and Ben Singer on drums, electric guitar, and electric bass. All songs written by Laura Boswell. Copyright 2014 Laura Boswell.

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released April 20, 2014

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Laura Boswell Asheville, North Carolina

Laura exhibits a poetic and technical depth that has garnered comparisons to Joni Mitchell, Nick Drake, and Norah Jones. She writes intimate folk music and draws upon her training in classical guitar and piano when crafting her own intricate style of songwriting. Laura views music as a bridge to human connection and vulnerability, as well as a powerful tool for fostering community. ... more

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